“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” Isaiah 43:18-19
There may be a season in your marriage where there may be a struggle. It may be a season where you notice communication has decreased. You and your spouse may be busy running a household and not investing much time into yourselves as a couple. It may be a season where you are healing after a betrayal. Whatever the cause, it is an excellent time to start making new memories. Here are some ways to do that.
Create New Habits
Have you ever heard the quote, “If you always do what you have always done, you will always be what you have always been.?” If you want a different marriage, be willing to make changes. Start some new habits.
Have you fallen into the habit of going to bed at different times? Try going to bed together. It will give you a kid-free time to unwind and talk about your day. If one of you is truly a night owl, maybe you could get out of bed after your spouse has gone to sleep. Are you an early riser? Great! Get up early and have some quiet time, then take a cup of coffee in later to your mate. Don’t let things that used to be a frustration, like different sleep cycles, hinder connection in your marriage.
I am a creature of habit. If I find a restaurant or food I like, I never stray. My husband and I have been trying to add some excitement and try new restaurants. Suggest to your spouse that you discover new restaurants and date night ideas. Don’t resort to the places you used to enjoy together. You are trying to remold your marriage, so it is a great time to change up your date night. Many cities have Facebook groups with excellent recommendations for restaurants in your area. Do some research and plan a night out at a new place.
Do you avoid doing fun things on the weekend because that is when the household chores used to be done? Time to change up that habit. Plan to conquer some of that list after work one evening and leave Saturday open to explore a park near your home or a museum you have never visited.
Remember me? The creature of habit? I am also very scheduled. If I didn’t have something planned out ahead of time, I am guilty of seeing it as an intrusion instead of an opportunity to do something spontaneous and fun.
We need to stop being so serious. What can you do to add some spontaneity to your marriage? Find something fun to explore in your state and make it a memorable day trip. Pack a picnic, enjoy some quiet time together, trade babysitting with a friend, and make a last-minute reservation at a hotel for the night.
Be Willing to Try Something New
The goal is to make some new memories, so don’t be so stuck in the past that you are unwilling to try new things. That may be as simple as a restaurant or as involved as finding a new way to handle conflict. Which, by the way, I highly suggest. Find new ways to communicate. Find new ways to express frustration. Find new ways to show gratitude to your spouse. Find new ways to communicate love.
New memories are ready to be made! Don’t cling so tightly to the past that you miss the chance to create some beautiful memories with your precious spouse.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:31-32