“And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors…For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:12, 14-15
Have you forgiven your spouse for the hurts they have caused? We receive many emails and letters from hurting, wounded spouses harboring unforgiveness. Have you forgiven? Ask the Lord to examine your heart and be honest with yourself.
I want to discuss unforgiveness. This can be a significant hindrance in your spiritual life. I want you to understand the importance of forgiveness in your life and marriage.
“Me, forgive my spouse? Look at what they are still doing! What about my children? My spouse is destroying our family. Look at my finances and my home, and look at me! What about my feelings? I hurt so much. When is this going to end? How can I forgive my spouse when they keep on sinning?”
Does that sound like you? There is freedom and liberty for the person who can forgive someone who has hurt them. Let’s read what the Lord teaches us:
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.“ Matthew 18:21-22
I know it is difficult to forgive others when they hurt you. Your marriage problems and resentment impact more than just you and your spouse. You can make a difference by putting God’s Word into action and forgiving your husband or wife.
Living in the flesh and reacting to every evil thing your spouse does can be easy. You may have lost control more than once in a telephone conversation when you argued. What should you do? Let’s read the Word of God and apply it to your life and circumstances. What did Jesus do when this happened to Him?
But how is it to your credit if you receive a beating for doing wrong and endure it? But if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God. To this you were called, because Jesus Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example that you should follow in his steps. “He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth.” When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate, when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. 1 Peter 2:20-23
What do you need to do if you are struggling with unforgiveness? First, release each offense and the offender into the hands of God. Choose to forgive your spouse or another person or family member every day, and allow the Lord to take the feelings you have. Forgiveness is a choice. Imagine laying your spouse or the other person at the Lord’s feet and let Him deal with their words, actions, and behavior. Do not allow unforgiveness to turn into bitterness and unresolved anger in your own life. Our Lord God teaches these principles of truth in His Word:
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:31-32
You may already know of a person who has struggled with unforgiveness, and now they have become an irate, bitter person. We know of marriages that have had problems because one spouse had been wounded in their childhood, and they have been harboring unforgiveness their whole life. Regardless of the act that was done so many years ago or now, the Lord can set you or someone else, the innocent victim, free if you will choose to forgive your husband/wife, the other person, or anyone else who has wounded you, hurt you, or abandoned you. Let go and let God deal with that other person.
Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Colossians 3:13
Today, forgive your spouse and ask the Lord to change their heart and your own. You need to forgive them daily for anything they are doing against you. You will be continuing this principle and step even after your marriage is restored. So let’s start forgiving today!
We have some great podcast episodes on this topic that I encourage you to check out. I will continue this topic in tomorrow’s Fight for Your Marriage Devotional, so make sure you come back.
Click here to read part 2 of this devotional.
God bless,
NEW PODCAST TODAY
Navigating Change in Marriage
Life is full of changes, and marriage is no exception. As we go through different seasons, some triggers can disrupt a relationship. We want to help you learn how to grow as a Christian and support your spouse. One area where women need support is through the changes that come with peri-menopause and mid-life changes.
In this episode, we’re joined by Danna Demetre, a nurse, health coach, fitness professional, and author who has spent years helping others live with health and purpose. We discuss the challenges that come with life’s transitions, from shifting health and energy levels to personality changes.
This episode is for both men and women of all ages. Men, you will learn how to support and care for your spouse through hormonal changes, and women will gain valuable insight on how to prepare both their body and mind for this journey.
Danna shares biblical encouragement and practical wisdom for standing by your spouse, no matter what season of life you’re in.
YES…forgiveness is for me…to find peace, joy, freedom, victory. Leave him in the hands of God who always judges fairly, who never stops working in his life. Many of those verses are regular prayers for me. Thanks for the reminder.
Another illustration is to move that person’s offenses from my hook to God’s hook. Then, I quit being burdened by the offenses because God is carrying them.