Today’s devotional is written by Lori Steinkamp Lassen. She is our only daughter, who has been married to her husband, Scott for 27 years. Lori is the mother of four children, and has worked with the ministry for many years. May her devotional deepen your spiritual walk with the Lord. – Charlyne
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Romans 12:18
How different would your marriage look if you always tried to live at peace with your spouse? Do you remember what peace in your home felt like? You may be in a spot where things have slowly spiraled toward conflict instead of peace. Would your marriage be different if you adopted the you before me attitude?
I started with a loaded question but stick with me. My husband and I were talking about how often couples misunderstand each other and misunderstand the intentions of their spouse. Those misunderstandings can compound and cause significant strife in a marriage.
We need to understand that we don’t think, rationalize, feel, love, or act exactly like our spouse. We are different creatures who God created and designed, and He didn’t make a mistake. Men and women relate to one another differently, but that doesn’t mean it is wrong. Instead of thinking of our differences as a negative, think of ways you can use those differences to make a positive impact in your marriage.
For example, you may not be a natural planner, but looking ahead in your marriage can be vital. Take time with your spouse to look at future events and figure out some upcoming things that could be a stressor in your marriage. What can be done ahead of time to help your marriage stay strong in that season?
Family vacations used to be a stressor in my parent’s marriage. Without fail, we would barely make it out of the neighborhood before an argument broke out, and we returned to the house. Things would get sorted out, and within a couple of hours, we would be on the road again. When my parent’s marriage was restored, that was one area they had to get in front of. They had to figure out what caused the strife and how they could each have an attitude that put the other person first.
- Make a list of upcoming areas that could cause strife and create a plan to strengthen your marriage in this season.
Every couple is going to face challenges at some point. Being sensitive to the needs of your spouse will help you weather those storms. Ask the Lord to help you have an attitude that strives to see your spouse’s needs and responds. Can you imagine how special your marriage could be if each spouse loved their spouse the way Christ loves us?
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. Philippians 2:3-4