Whoever pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honor. Proverbs 21:21
We are fortunate to live near the Atlantic Ocean and have two cruise ports nearby. We love looking at these massive ships when they are in port. When a cruise ship leaves port, there is usually a pilot onboard for a short time. The role of the pilot is to help advise the crewmembers on the ship as they enter and exit a port.
I saw a video of a pilot who had safely guided a ship out to sea and was being picked up to return to the port. A much smaller boat lined itself up with the cruise ship and got in what seemed to be perfect unison. As the cruise ship took on a big wave, the pilot boat took the same. Minutes later, a person emerged from the ship’s side and lowered himself safely down a ladder onto the perfectly aligned pilot boat.
The scene is fascinating. I mean, there is no chance I would want the pilot’s job. I would freeze midway through my attempt at getting on or off the ship. The pilot’s ease at boarding the smaller vessel was impressive, but I was more impressed with the captain of the pilot boat. When they approached the ship, they became one vessel. The pilot boat stood steady as he waited for his passenger to board.
Watching this perfect dance made me think of marriage. Our goal should be to unite and navigate the waters of life in unison. Some days there may be rough seas. On other days it could feel like smooth sailing. If one of those boats would have pulled away to do its own thing, there would have been a tragedy.
There may be days when you purposefully pull away from your spouse. You may be holding a grudge about something, or maybe outside influences are causing your emotional separation. You don’t have to look out on the water to see if the two vessels are aligned. You know in your spirit with the way you are treating each other. One spouse may be giving the silent treatment. Another may be doing the opposite and answering with harsh and unkind words.
There will be days when it takes much effort to align your heart with your spouse. It may happen in a season of life that can easily cause division, like after a significant life change. It may occur because sin has crept in. It may happen when one person stops trying.
Relationships take effort. It takes two people willing to steady each other on the rough days so you can enjoy the beauty of the easy days. Can you make it your goal to show your spouse love every day?
Don’t just do it on the days they deserve it. Don’t just do it if they show love to you first. In every situation, ask the Lord to equip you to be loving to your spouse. That is when you will see two individuals walking in unison as your marriage becomes more like Christ.
And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love. 2 John 6