Today’s message is from Bob, who was a prodigal who returned home and was remarried to me for an additional 23 years before the Lord took him home to Heaven. Bob wrote 19 books from the prodigal’s perspective for more than two decades after our divorce and remarriage. – Charlyne
Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister. 1 John 4:20-21
When marriage problems come to a family, words can become weapons used by one spouse in an attempt to destroy that one-flesh relationship. We could easily compile a list of the hurting phrases used most often that deepen the hurt of an already-wounded mate. Without doubt, at the top of that list would be, “I never loved you.” Even after years of marriage, possibly having birthed children together and scores of happy family memories, someone declares that he or she never loved you.
Our divorce was final many years ago, yet we can still recall the reckless and hurtful way that phrase was tossed into what we then thought was our terminal conversations as husband and wife.
There is a difference between the spouse who may be saying, “I never loved you,” and your Savior who says, “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.” John 15:9
The spouse who has walked away from your marriage is blinded and likely living for themselves. Those hurtful words that don’t sound like the one you married, are likely the result of a person who is giving in to the temptations of the enemy.
From our experience, we can share why those words are sometimes said. Your prodigal mate may feel that if they say the words or put actions behind them that declare, “I never loved you,” enough, they may actually stop loving you. Praise God for the one-flesh relationship that He has created between you and your mate. We encourage you to stand with the Lord for the complete restoration and healing of your marriage.
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. Genesis 2:24
Someday, in the Lord’s perfect timing, I pray that you will hear the one who is now saying, “I never loved you,” declare instead, “I never stopped loving you.” That is the day we will rejoice with you. Until that day, allow the Lord to be your spouse for this season. The One who has loved you with an everlasting love can become closer and more real than you can imagine. Jesus loved you so much that He died for you. Love Him and be loved by Him during this season of waiting.
“Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. The one who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them.” John 14:21
Because He lives,