Restored and Redeemed

Has your marriage been restored? Restored & Redeemed is a devotional for those in a restored marriage.

Pay Attention to Your Marriage

Today’s devotional is written by Lori Steinkamp Lassen. She is our only daughter, who has been married to her husband, Scott for 28 years. Lori is the mother of four children, and has worked with the ministry for many years. May her devotional deepen your spiritual walk with the Lord. – Charlyne

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. James 1:19-20 

Several months ago, I decided to repaint my home office. As usually happens with my home-improvement projects, they are last-minute decisions. Since we had not prepared for this newly announced weekend project, my family was helping me empty the room by tossing its contents into boxes, laundry baskets, bags, or whatever we could find. Our only goal was to get the office emptied so that we could paint.

Any time I do a project at home, the rest of the house falls apart. Does that happen to anyone else? We had books and boxes everywhere. When we finally finished the job and reloaded the office, it felt like the items that needed to go back in my small office multiplied. Exhaustion set in, and we decided to take care of the last couple of boxes later in the week.

Fast forward several months. I was looking for a book that I knew should be in my office. I searched and searched and could not find this book. I tried to recall if I had loaned the book to anyone and came up empty. Weeks later, I noticed a small box that had been sitting in my bedroom. That was the missing box. Somehow, it had been placed in my room and never unpacked.

I spent months looking past this box. It was almost in the walkway. How did I miss it? How did I not think about the box every day when I saw it? The answer is, I looked past it. I somehow just lived my life as if that box was not in the wrong place and begging to be unpacked.

The same thing can happen in our marriage if we aren’t paying attention. We can look past problems and never deal with them. That can then turn into bitterness and resentment. It is essential to communicate with each other and deal with issues as they arise.

My husband and I are pretty good at communicating, but some of that comes from the fact that we can read each other so well. I can tell by looking at his face if something is bothering him. In return, he can tell by how I put dishes away if I am upset. Gulp! Can anyone relate to the hostile housework method of communicating?

Be purposeful about dealing with issues as they arise. Don’t let something small sit and grow for days. Understand that as a couple striving to be more like Christ in your marriage and how you love each other, you need to be willing to communicate your frustrations and, in return, have an understanding heart when your spouse communicates.

Don’t overlook the problems and think they will just resolve on their own.

Have you found an effective way to communicate when tension is high and there is something that needs to be dealt with? I would love it if you shared it with me here.

God bless,


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The Path To Marriage Restoration​

This teaching is Charlyne’s introduction to “How To Stand & Fight For Your Marriage!” Charlyne’s goal is to teach you, a stander, or someone you know with marriage problems, the path to marriage restoration that she has learned over the past twenty-five years.