Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6
When you prayed for marriage restoration, did you have an idea of what life would look like when your spouse came home?
Maybe you imagined that your spouse would return home completely changed. You may have thought they would suddenly be attentive, loving, spiritually mature, and ready to make up for all the time that was lost.
Then restoration happened, and you may have discovered that your spouse was still a work in progress.
Guess what? So are you.
One of the hardest things in marriage restoration can be watching your spouse struggle in an area where you desperately want to see change. You may recognize an attitude that concerns you. Maybe they aren’t spending time with the Lord the way you hoped they would. They may be struggling with communication, anger, selfishness, or some habit that you prayed would be gone by the time they came home.
Do you find yourself saying, Lord, I prayed for this restoration. When are you going to change them?”
Be careful that you don’t try to take the job of the Holy Spirit. You are their spouse.
The Holy Spirit can handle convicting your spouse.
Your job is to love them, pray, encourage, and allow God to bring about change.
That doesn’t mean you have to ignore sin or pretend there aren’t problems. There will continue to be times when you need to have hard conversations with your spouse. There will be areas where you need to set up accountability.
You need to recognize the difference between addressing an issue and trying to manage or control your spouse’s spiritual growth.
You may not be noticing change as quickly as you hoped, but that doesn’t mean God isn’t at work.
Keep praying.
Keep loving.
Keep having hard conversations.
Ask the Lord to help you trust Him in the areas where growth and healing may be going slower than you expected.
As you pray for your spouse, ask the Lord to continue working in your life as well.
He is faithful!
