Charlyne Cares


Are you standing for the restoration of your marriage? A daily devotional that will offer encouragement from God’s Word as you stand for the restoration of your marriage.

What Your Suddenly Is Not

Each week we share guest devotionals. The views expressed below are those of the writer and may not reflect the views of Rejoice Marriage Ministries or the Steinkamps.

Has the Lord placed a devotional on your heart that you would like to share with other standers?

We may be guilty of fantasizing and romanticizing this “suddenly.” The long-awaited moment lingers in our mind like the magical ending of our favorite romance where undying love is professed. Fiction and fantasy are not where God wants us to lock our gaze. We fix our eyes on Jesus, on Truth. When we hope in the Lord, we may be given glimpses of our future but not in the realm of our fantasy.

My husband held my hands at a ‘Weekend to Remember’ and restated our wedding vows as our eyes were locked. My heart was full of hope, trying to push away doubt and fear. I knew this was part of the program and a part of me wanted it so badly. I praise God for the moment. I thank Him for the opportunity. I am so grateful for my husband’s willingness. Do not read these next words wrong. This beautiful precious moment was an amazing gift from God, a wonderful miracle that I hold in my heart. But it did not instantly erase every problem, every fear, or every doubt.

Standing forever means that the weekend will end. We will drive home, and Monday will arrive. Monday, here I am. A bit more whole, but still some broken. Full and overflowing with questions, memories, desires, and problems. I still know that every day we wake up, each one of us decides to stay, come home, listen to God. I am grateful, joyful, and even at times exuberant at the work of God. I do stand in awe of the miracle that I witnessed just like the Hebrews on the other side of the Red Sea. The miracle came suddenly. We were whisked away to the other side. The enemy was crushed in the mighty waters. Now, it is Monday figuratively. We have mouths to feed, tents to set up, clothes to wash. There will be disagreements on the right place for that tent for sure.

In just a few verses, the Hebrews find themselves hungry, thirsty, and tired. There is a lot of hard work after the suddenly. Your prodigal may not be as ready to roll up their sleeves and rebuild. There might be an attitude of “just be glad I’m here.” The real meaning and walking out of love begins here. New struggles and even more waiting are in store. I still find myself feeling so alone although together. Pressing into Jesus and holding tighter than ever is the only way to survive the before and after of this suddenly, the only way of surviving through any storm.

Your spouse, broken, beaten, and still entrapped in so many ways will not be ready to help you heal from their own actions. It is very possible that even knowing you are hurt will make them respond in frustration and anger. Shame lurks in their hearts causing volatile thoughts and feelings that may be directed at you. During these early days, it’s important to not immediately turn to your spouse for the comfort and love you have been so desperately wanting. Consider them for a time to be in recovery. Keep your eyes on Christ. Give them space to grow, heal, and rediscover their love for God, for you. It requires even more zipping your lips, complete selflessness. Every “I deserve” and “what about me” is an enemy of your restoration. Only by surrendering yourself, considering your spouse’s needs above your own and daily carrying your cross will the restoration continue to unfold.

I thank God for all the many, many times He has helped me to zip my lips. I ask forgiveness for the times when I fail. I ask Him for the strength to pour myself out completely and to wait patiently. Give everything, surrender all of me for this restoration He has planned for us. I realize that every move to protect myself, defend myself or even to seek healing through my spouse is the wrong direction. Unconditional love, bearing all things, enduring all things, will be the daily walk as I seek to fulfill 1 Corinthians 13. Seeking God’s help, love and comfort will be just as necessary now as before.

Every ounce of anger, bitterness, malice must be daily erased. You may feel like it is gone and then find yourself having to deal with it over and over again. I have often pictured God redeeming some of those things the enemy tried to steal. The seat on the porch where this dreadful event happened is where I sit and praise God for holding me in that desperate moment. The place where I dropped to my knees and cried out becomes a sacred place where I know Jesus wept with me as He did Lazarus’ sisters. Redeeming memories is my daily choice. I can either let the enemy keep them, or I can take those memories and see God in them. I can see His presence, His plans, His provisions. When the enemy shouts out accusations based on a memory or event that occurred, I respond with God’s truth.

The enemy will use all of the events of the past to keep you from having peace, regaining trust, and moving toward oneness. He will create insecurities, suspicions and keep the old wounds open. Defeating his lies and replacing it with the truth from God will be a daily battle. It is just as important now to listen and follow the Holy Spirit.

One morning I saw a rainbow out the window, a full complete rainbow of promise. I stepped outside to take a picture and I heard behind me a group of grackles. I dislike those birds and their loud squawking. As I turned to look at them, God gently said, “Don’t look behind; look ahead to My promises.” Philippians 3:13.

Dianne in Texas

Rejoice Marriage Ministries

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Lalitha
Lalitha
1 month ago

Hallelujah Dianne! So good to hear that your marriage is restored. Thank you for sharing the hard work that also comes with it and to move ahead trusting in Jesus! Father we lean on You. You know each of us, our individual stories and which part of our restoration journey we are on. Help us trust You completely in the process so that our marriages can be rebuilt on the solid Rock of Jesus.

Firm Foundation
I’ve still got joy in chaos
I’ve got peace that makes no sense
I won’t be going under
I’m not held by my own strength
‘Cause I’ve built my life on Jesus
He’s never let me down
He’s faithful through every season
So why would He fail now?
https://youtu.be/uOP4s8fOEm0

Amelia
Amelia
1 month ago

😭😭😭😭😭. Thank you Dianne. You’re such a blessing. May God continue to grow me, us, into the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To Him be glory from now and forever, for yours and others’ restoration. I already Praise Him for all suddenlies for all of us who are waiting in Him.

Lalitha
Lalitha
1 month ago

https://open.spotify.com/episode/4G9nGpfGPAlsM0Yg1a2mSm?si=iBO6UDOvS2yk2TQ-RoIEGA&utm_source=copy-link

This sermon kind of resonated with what you said . There are giants in Promised land and there’s hard work

Alicia
Alicia
1 month ago

This is such an important lesson and one I did not understand the first time around. I ended up in the same situation I was in before. I have realized that last time my spouse came home, it wasnt long until I was leaning on my spouse instead of God. Oh, the pressure! This time, I am keeping in my heart to always go to the Lord first in all situations. I praise Him for my current situation because it led me back to Him! I still cry as often as I pray but I know that even when my suddenly comes I will need to stay strong in the Lord and vigilant of the enemy’s schemes. What a lesson! Thank you Father for giving me another chance. The heartbreak is nothing compared to the benefit of knowing You and witnessing Your glory. Romans 8:18
I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.

Lisa
Lisa
1 month ago

God is so good. This is just what I needed for today… as I have been asking how could I make it when my marriage is restored.. dealing with all the hurt and being betrayed. And the memories of the OW … The you Lord for being so good to me🙌🏻🙌🏻

Susan
Susan
1 month ago

Thank you! This Devotional is a gift! My “suddenly” just happened in May, I THINK! I was asking the Lord today if this was it! My husband isn’t saved. I expected the whole package of his conversion along with marital restoration and I’m not sure if restoration has happened because he’s still on the fence. One foot in our marriage and keeping a pinky toe in his old life. Dianne’s post answered all my questions!! GOD IS SO GOOD!

Marie
Marie
1 month ago

I echo the words, Hallelujah! Feeling more every day like my suddenly is near. May we all rest in the Promise Giver/Promise Keeper as we await His perfect work! For we KNOW – not we hope so – that He causes ALL things to work together for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose! We praise You, Lord. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Crystal
Crystal
1 month ago

Thank you Dianne for sharing! May God continue to bless your restored marriage! 🙏🏽🙌🏽

Makenzie
Makenzie
1 month ago

I keep wondering if God is speaking to me about my “suddenly” being near… references keep coming for “suddenly” I also am now really starting to realize & see how God IS speaking to me! Like something clicked & it is like Yes God I believe you! These are NOT coincidences! I have some scary stuff coming up .& have been praying & asking for God to give me favor in the eyes of the judge so my husband & I can get marriage counseling & be on the way to a RESTORED marriage. I just cry out to God about this – to get us this marriage counseling & give me favor. A lady told me the other day God told her everything was still on track. She is someone who has been praying & even fasted for my marriage for me & she really hears from God. She said she saw though everything was supposed to fall into place like dominoes & because it hasn’t & is taking longer then what she felt God showed her she asked God if I missed the opportunity & she said God told her it was still on track & she said that God just has so much favor for me like He has a special pouring out of favor over me. & I have been asking God for favor specifically in this area that the judge will have favor & we WILL get this marriage counseling. So yesterday morning I was praying & asking God to speak to me like I just really wanted to know it was Him speaking to me. I was waking up & I heard – Exodus 3 Exodus 3 Exodus 3. I looked it up & read –

 The Lord said, “I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt. I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I am concerned about their suffering. So I have come down to rescue them from the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land into a good and spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey

21 And I will give this people favor in the sight of the Egyptians; and it shall be

I was praying this morning again & this time I asked God if He was going to make a way to get this marriage counseling for us & then not even an hour later I was listening to a video I will share here because it may help some fellow standers because it was about free will & this pastor literally used this verse!!! Exodus 3:21 that God is in control & sovereign & another translation even shows God saying – I will MAKE them favor. That God has the power & ability to do whatever He pleases. This just showed me God is really speaking to me. The way He told me Exodus 3 & then I watched this sermon the next day! WOW!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQdEUuMfsKo

Sarah
Sarah
1 month ago
Reply to  Makenzie

Yes, Mackenzie, God is and has been speaking to you. What an awesome revelation regarding Exodus 3:21. So encouraging.

Makenzie
Makenzie
1 month ago
Reply to  Sarah

@Sarah what is crazy too is before I even clicked on the video to watch it- I said God it would be cool if you shared that verse with me to confirm – Proverbs 21:1 the one you shared with me! I had never heard that verse at all until you shared it about the King’s heart & how God turns it whichever way He wills. Then I heard that verse again after you shared it with me. Then I watch this video & he uses the same verse!

The Exodus one was cool because it was like the Holy Spirit literally spoke it to me. I was like that wasn’t me! Then today hearing it in this video confirmed it wasn’t me & it wasn’t random. It was God! So now I just wonder if that is Him answering me that He will have favor with me in the eyes of the judge to get this marriage counseling. That is the only thing I have been asking God about having favor for me. For my husband & I to get this marriage counseling which would put everything on hold while we did counseling for 90 days.

Makenzie
Makenzie
1 month ago
Reply to  Sarah

& I now believe He gave me a promise to restore my marriage. I am not sure if you saw my other comment somewhere but I mentioned how I asked for another confirmation so that I could know that I know that I know & then God gave me the verse 3 times that says – Truly I have spoken: truly I will bring it to pass. Be assured. I will do it. When there is only one thing I am asking Him about!

I just don’t know how or when…I am praying it is by this marriage counseling.

Last edited 1 month ago by Makenzie
Bianca
Bianca
1 month ago
Reply to  Makenzie

Mackenzie,
I rejoice with you. I too have had a joirney in figuring out when it was the Lord speaking versus me having wishful thinking.
I want to say one thing, if you would not mind. Your husband has free will, no matter of you have counseling or not, that is bot the key, the key is that he becomes fully surrendered to God. if he doesn’t want to do marriage counseling, that judgement won’t matter anyway. But God wants his son to know, love and trust Him.

Makenzie
Makenzie
1 month ago
Reply to  Bianca

I feel like I am realizing I have had too many confirmations for them to be coincidence. My husband has free will, but then why would God keep confirming something over & over if ultimately his “free will” were going to effect that? Not just about the marriage counseling, but about restoring my marriage.All the confirmations that say – He is restoring. How I saw back to back – A promise is a promise. I watched a testimony of a restored marriage called that. That God does not promise something & not come through. His word is His word & He is no man to lie. Then the next day devotion on here was called – A promise is a promise. So that is God confirming it is a promise…so it doesn’t matter about my husband’s “free will” then.

Yes the key is God would use the counseling for that. My husband’s heart to soften & fully surrender to God.

Rebecca
Rebecca
1 month ago

That last statement the Lord spoke to you about not looking back but looking ahead to the promise/rainbow was so profound!

Bianca
Bianca
1 month ago

This is really, really on time. I wish there was a way to save it or share it to my email. I am going to need to refer to this in the future. I know my suddenly is here.

Kate
Kate
1 month ago
Reply to  Bianca

Bianca, you can sign up to have them delivered to your email daily. Or copy and paste! I often do this so I can print special ones, this one included.

Krystal
Krystal
1 month ago

Thank you. Great testimony and encouragement for us standers. God bless you and your family.

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The Path To Marriage Restoration​

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